“You know the lab result came back and said that was Larry’s blood on the clothes in the back of your car,” Sadowsky reminded him.
Richie said nothing and hugged himself, rocking slightly back and forth on the bed.
“Let me tell you, Rich, I am not without compassion,” said Sadowsky. “I understand how tough it can be for a bright young fella such as yourself. You-all grow up around wiseguys like Teddy and Vin all your life, and all you want to be is a made guy. I want to tell you, I know what it’s like to have to give up on a dream. I wanted to be an all-state linebacker when I was growing up and then I got polio. They thought they’d wiped it out but somehow I done went and got it anyway. And I used to dream every night about gettin’ on out of that wheelchair and kickin’ the shit out of some skinny-ass quarterback in the end zone. Joe Montana. I’d sit on his face. Who-haa!!”
He clapped his hands and grinned as he made the sound of impact. Richie almost jumped in surprise. But then the smile began to melt from Sadowsky’s face. “Yeah,” said the agent. “That was my dream. But when I woke up in the morning and saw I was still a gimp, it broke my heart all over again. So don’t think I don’t understand. I know what it’s like to feel like you don’t have any power to control what’s going to happen.”
Richie slowly raised his head and looked at him. “Well, if you know what I’m going through, why don’t you just let me go?”
Sadowsky laughed and laughed. “Come on, Richard. Let’s get serious,” he said, slapping his knee. “Tell me what you-all know about who whacked Larry and his son Nicky.”
29
IN THE TWO YEARS I had at Temple University, I learned that everything comes in stages. There’s death, with rage, denial, acceptance, and all that. Then there’s wisdom, with satori and nirvana. But now I was finding there were different stages to desperation. Like hysteria, numbness, and oh-God-I-can’t-believe-I-have-to-deal- with-this-asshole.
The asshole in this case was a loan shark named Danny Klein. A cruddy little guy in a blue running suit and glasses, who always smelled like the bottom of a birdcage. I’d arranged to meet him in a lounge just off the Golden Doubloon’s casino floor.
He was reading a copy of the
“Y’know, they tell me there was a war going on a while back,” he said. “Something about oil in the Middle East. The fuck do I care? I’m already fighting the war in here.”
“What war is that, Danny?”
“The war for survival.” He folded the paper in half and put it on the table. “I’m a degenerate compulsive gambler with a severe bipolar personality disorder and a drinking problem and here I’m lending money to people in the middle of a recession. So don’t talk to me about war. I know war.”
I noticed there was a white strip of adhesive tape holding together the center nosepiece of his broken glasses. He looked like a demented college professor who’d been thrown down the stairs a couple of times too many.
“What can I do you for?” he asked with a sniff and poke at the adhesive tape.
“I’m looking to borrow some money.”
I didn’t know any other way to begin. I’d stayed awayfrom people like Danny Klein for most of my life. With the money I already owed Teddy, I had no business with loan sharks. But I was at that third stage of desperation.
“How much?” he asked.
“Sixty large.”
He whistled and I could see his eyes swimming behind his glasses. “What’re you gonna do with it? Run off and start a circus?”
“Never mind what I need it for. You’ll get it back with your interest.”
Danny’s eyes narrowed. “See, I have a problem with anxiety management, and it gets worse when I hear ‘don’t worry about it, Danny. I’ll get it back to you.’ I already have a very strict regimen of pills I’m taking. Prozac, Valium, Lithium.” He began taking out little orange prescription bottles and lining them up on the round table. “I’m trying to balance them out with my alcohol intake. And now you sit down and announce you want sixty thousand from me and won’t tell me what it’s for. Does that seem fair?”
“I’m sorry, Danny. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
But I wasn’t going to tell him about the boxing promotion either. A lot of Danny’s money came from people like Teddy and my father, and I didn’t want Danny telling them what I needed it for. It was bad enough having to sink to these depths. But I didn’t see any other way.
Danny rattled a highball glass with ice cubes in it and asked the waitress for a drink called Sex on the Beach. I just had a beer to settle my nerves. Another bad habit I was falling into.
“Anthony, let me tell you a little story,” said Danny, suddenly sitting upright. “Did you know I used to be a millionaire?”
“No, I didn’t.”
“I used to be one of the top bookmakers in Philadelphia,” he said, taking a pill at random from one of the bottles and gulping it down with the drink the waitress brought him. “Every Saturday, I had forty phones ringing with schmucks trying to bet on college football. It was like a disco, everybody mumbling, ‘I gotta get down, gotta get down.’ I hadda start working with another bookie, just so I could lay offsome of the action. Ever see a job opening for a bookmaker? No. Because it’s a great goddamn business, that’s what it is.”
“Look Danny,” I started to say. “All that’s very interesting, but I promise you’ll get your points ...”
He chopped me off with his hand. “Listen, shmendrick, I’m trying to teach you something.” He paused, making sure he had my full attention. “I used to get into these manic phases where I would come down here to Atlantic City and gamble my brains out. I’d play blackjack, roulette, and baccarat, screw fifteen hookers, and then get so drunk I wouldn’t remember any of it.”
“I’m not borrowing money to gamble, Danny.” I smiled.
“Wipe that goddamned smile off your face,” he hissed. For a little guy Danny could be fierce. “I’m trying to tell you how I lost every cent I had and had to go borrow money from your father Vin and Teddy. Do you know what happened when I couldn’t pay it off?”
The question hung in the air between us for a second, and I became aware of the bells ringing and change spilling on the casino floor.
“Your father held me down on the floor by the arms,” said Danny, “and Larry DiGregorio spread my legs. And then Teddy came up and stomped up on my balls.”
I felt my scrotum shrivel.
“Yeah, you don’t know the half of it,” Danny said bitterly. “I was in the hospital a month. They hadda amputate one of my balls because it got gangrenous.” He leaned across the table and blew that parakeet breath of his right in my face. “So I wouldn’t expect much in the way of mercy if I were you, Anthony. Not if you’re thinking about missing a payment. Like I said, it’s a war in here. And in a war people get hurt. Just ask Larry.”
I started to stand up. “So are you going to lend me the money or what?”
“Yeah, I’ll probably spot you some, seeing as you got a house and a cement truck as collateral,” Danny said, scratching the back of his head furiously, like he had fleas. “But it’s a large sum you’re asking for. I wouldn’t just go to one source to get it, like Teddy. I’m learning to diversify. Like in banking. It’s an interesting parallel. The emphasis on paying off interest before the principal. I’ll discuss it with you sometime.”
“Well don’t go telling Teddy or any of the others that I’m looking to borrow all this money.”
If Teddy found out, he’d flatten my head the way he flattened Danny Klein’s ball.
Danny smiled enigmatically. “I know the value of discretion, provided you hold up your end of the bargain.”
“I will.”
“That’s good. Because I’d hate to tell Ted what you’re up to.” His smile faded.
